The Aftermath: Bumpersticker Mania
by Amaris Ethne
Summary: Final Installement in "Life's Stories" Series. Bumper stickers for eveyone! :) Please Read and Review.


THE AFTERMATH: BUMPER STICKER MANIA.  
  
Xander felt bad. Giles got the funny bumper stickers, but no one else did. So, calling Giles up Xander asked the Brit if he wanted to have a little fun.   
  
An hour later they were in the You Say It, We Print It store down town, having way too much fun. The two had split up to find the pranks, and though he wasn't really looking for one for them, Xander found a couple for both Giles and Angel. One was black with red lettering; "Impotence: Nature's way of saying "no hard feelings"" the other read "If sex is a pain in the ass, you're doing it wrong."  
  
Xander even found one for the Slayer; "Men have two faults; all they say and all they do." Spike got one that read "A hard-on doesn't count as personal growth" and his witchy redheaded girlfriend got one that said "It ain't the size, it's...no, no, it's the size."   
  
Giles found the most. The most fun he had were the ones for Angel. A black one with bold, white lettering had a picture of a bed on it with two people in it and read "Disappointed? Too bad." Another said "Come out, come out where ever you are" and had a picture of a pair of pants.   
  
A bright green sticker caught Giles's eye and he immediately bought it for Anya and the bright blue one behind it as well. One read "It's only kinky the first time" and the other "Kinky as a pubic hair."   
  
Giles found one for both Willow and Cordy saying, "Sex is like Pizza. When it's good it's really good. When it's bad...it's still pretty good." Willow alone got one reading "Good girls get fat, bad girls get eaten" and Cordy got the one that said "All men are created equal...poor things."   
  
To go with Spike, Giles got the peroxide blond vamp one that said, "If you smoke after sex, you're doing it too fast" and one that read "The sex was so good that even the neighbours had a cigarette." He also received one that suited the womaniser to a tee; "Remember my name-you'll be screaming it later."  
  
The shopping done, the boys ran off into the night to deliver their gifts.   
  
"Luv, come on out here!" Spike yelled. Sleepily, Willow came outside to see what her boyfriend was yelling about. He pointed at the back of her car, a smirk on his face. Willow spotted her colourful stickers and quietly read them, breaking out into fits of laughter.  
  
"You had breakfast yet?" she asked Spike.  
  
"Why?" he asked, not understanding. Willow put her arms around his neck and whispered in a sultry voice  
  
"I've been a bad girl."  
  
"XANDER!" Anya yelled, stomping into their apartment.   
  
"Yeah, babe?"   
  
"That thingy they stuck on my car is wrong!"  
  
"What do you mean?" Xander asked. He didn't know Giles had got one for Anya.  
  
"It is NOT just kinky the first time...at least not if you do it right!" Anya argued. Xander just laughed.  
  
"I don't know about that, An."  
  
"Take your clothes back off. I'll show you."  
  
"Yes, ma'am!"  
  
"Cordelia! Did you see what they did?" Angel yelled, coming into their apartment. Cordy just shook her head. Grabbing her hand, Angel pulled her outside, pointing wildly at the back of his car.   
  
"That is not wrong!" Angel argued.  
  
"WHAT?"  
  
"And it's not THAT SMALL!" He continued. Cordy laughed and grabbed the front of his shirt.  
  
"Come on, dead boy. Let's see if we can find it so you can 'disappoint' me."  
  
"Hey! Is that your car?" a cute guy asked Buffy.   
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Everything men 'do' are not faults!" He argued, pointed at her bumper sticker. Buffy laughed, recognising the boy as someone in one of her classes. Someone who she had flirted with before.  
  
"All I've met fit that."  
  
"Well, I don't. Let me show you."  
  
Giles sat in his house, a small smile on his face. Everyone should have seen their stickers and should be upset, he figured. Little did he know that all of them were, at the very moment, in the heat of passion and excitement. Being mad at the stickers were the farthest things from their minds. He had no clue that he was the only one with 'no hard feelings.' 


End file.
